Categories
Diaries poetry

“Loveless,” (He called me)

“When will I have a place to put all this painful love?

I was born and he said,
“Hello loveless, let me
just load your heart
with love.” He smiled and
jammed it packed.
I said, “that hurts,
there’s a lot in there,
where am I going to
put it all? Will I find
anyone to give it to?”
He just smiled and said,
“go out, Loveless,
and love.”
And so I gave love my all.
I came to him later and
said, this load is
suffocating me. When will
someone come who will
want it?”
And he called me “Loveless”
and he said,
“Loveless, I made you to
carry all this love.
And this world is cruel
and cold.”
I said, “I don’t need told
that:
I’m used all the time,
but when will I have a
place to put all this
painful love?” 🤕💔
He said, “keep waiting,
Loveless.”
And so I did.

But, even later on down the road,
when I was still weighed down with
the exact amount of love and no less,
I came to him, weary and in much
pain. “When?” I asked. “When?
This hurts so bad. It hurts so so bad.
Can’t anyone come who will take this
love and not spit it out?”
“Keep carrying it, Loveless.”
And I did. Ever so painfully, I did.
But years later, I came again,
when I was a young woman, and I
asked him, “what is so wrong with me
that no one has come along and will
accept my love?”
This time, he finally looked at me
and he laughed! He busted into tears
laughing, and he said,
“Loveless! Did you not hear what I
named you? Have you not heard what
I call you? You are Loveless!! No one
will ever love you nor accept your love,
and you are to carry that burden
Alone. Forever. And ever and ever.
You are

Loveless.”

“That is cruel.” I said. And he just laughed as he
watched me limp through
the rest of my life carrying a burden of
love alone and in excruciating pain.

—A.M.M.

May 11, 2022 @ 11:55pm

By Alyssa McClure

I fancy myself a writer, a tea drinker, and a stare-at-the-sky kind of gal :)
I am currently writing "Kanda Land", "The Universe Inside Her II: a book of unsorted poetic letters", and, of course, "The 'Eternal I'" is in the works!
blog email: alyssamcclure@poppintalk.com

One reply on ““Loveless,” (He called me)”

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